Ethereal as the breeze you are –
were. You are gone now,
but were you ever here?
I have nothing physical,
no artefact to lay my hands on,
even the pocket-watch is hearsay,
passed to me the day after.
‘It was his father’s’.
Tonight Bjorn is barkeep over at dVerse, and is inviting us to write a Quadrille (a poem of 44 words), incorporating the word ‘breeze’ in the body of the poem.
I have no idea why ‘breeze’ inspired me to write this memory – for that’s what it is, and that is the pocket-watch above. Bizarrely the time it stopped working at (many years ago, I assume) is the time in the evening that my dad died.
Of course, you can be much more upbeat, sensual, comedic in your response – the choice is all yours! Please do take part though – it’s a great crowd over there!
41 thoughts on “Fade away – dVerse Quadrille 10”
“even the pocket-watch is hearsay”
Just fantastic wording here.
Thank you so much. I’m really pleased you enjoyed it!
I do love how you captured the memory here.. such a strong poem, and I do love the hearsay and the magic of the way it stopped.
Thank you, Bjorn.
The prompt worked perfectly is this beautiful poem.
Thank you, Josslyn. Sometimes, it’s beter not to wax too lyrical!
this has a melancholy feel – lovely
Thank you, Candy.
I love the story of the watch. I can well believe the watch stopped when it did. My father’s dog died an hour after he died. Sweetly sad poem.
Thank you so much. Animals have such a deep affinity with their owners. Thank you for sharing this, and I am sorry your dad is gone too.
Thank you. He was a dear man.
I love the way your chose to centre the lines, so that the poem itself resembles the watch. Such a gentle and heartfelt piece!
Thank you – I’m so glad you enjoyed it.
I admire the slight melancholy and sadness with the pocket watch ~ Beautifully written quadrille ~
Thank tou so much, Grace.
You managed to capture the ethereal.
Breeze of time has
no rigid ticks or tocks..
there was a tIme when
both i and wife walk around
the block after two years of
flight or fight stress for me..
she says oh that is weird
it feels like time suddenly
a split second
after i felt this
feeling of gravity
slowing time like
never ever before..
iN January of 2008..
i never looked at reaLITy
the sAMe after thaT or time
as ever just tick tock again
and no… now reTired since
then i have alMost no perception
oF tiMe aT all.. iN fAct i’M sure iT
doesn’T eXist wITh only noW aS reaLITy..:)
Thank you Katie!
My friend Freya..:)
even the pocket-watch is hearsay… what a tremendous line right there in the middle…loved it.
“Ethereal as the breeze you are –were. You are gone now, but were you ever here?”
~Oh my, this almost broke my heart. A beautifully, heartfelt poem you have Frey… ❤
Thank you so much, Maria.
My pleasure, Frey. 🙂
“even the pocket-watch is here say” — oh the meaning and emotion behind these words. This is just a brilliant poem.
Thank you, Lillian, I really appreciate it.
That last line really got me. Interesting how those tangible objects (or lack thereof) can be such a strong tie to the memories of a loved one.
Thank you, Brian. Yes, it struck me that all we have, without those tangibles, are memories. What happens when those memories fade, or get stolen away with illness?
This hits home. I have my grandfather’s pocket watch. In permanent ill-repair now, but in the day he would have me wind it for him. That’s how I’m sure it is his! Thanks for sharing this, Freya!
What a lovely memory, Walt! And to be allowed to wind it – such joy! Thank you for reading and taking the time.
Hey Freya. I live your poem from the perspective that you have expressed a whole void in such a few lines, but, my feelings on losing some one has seen such a drastic change of emotions, I don’t know how. Here is a glimpse, if you would like to know what I mean. https://sunsandseasundeep.wordpress.com/2016/06/01/you-2/
Thank you Sandeep. I’m going to read your link now. Of course I am interested!
It is such a complex thing, this grief, this loss and I feel that so much in reading your poem. I’m on my phone, travelling home from work and can’t write a comment on your blog. I will do, later this evening.
Hey Freya, that is perfectly fine. I shared that because I realize there is a very different feeling that drives me with respect to people that I have lost. Especially, the person in whose memory I wrote that.
Oh the “I wonder” at the end left me wondering too…
I really like this nostalgic and reflective quadrille.
Thank you so much.
Sensitive, melancholic reflection…nicely done with just the right amount of emotion. My quadrille…late
Thank you, Victoria.
Handsome watch; touching poem.