Category Funny

Only Joking – Friday Fictioneers

freyathewriter 48 Comments

Here is this week’s entry into the weekly challenge brought to us by the lovely Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Here are the rules: Use the photo as inspiration, write a hundred(ish) words – and share! Here goes my offering for this week – and I welcome your comments again!

Copyrigth - Roger Bultot

Copyright – Roger Bultot

– Only Joking –

“Hello? Parking Services?”

“Yes, sir. How may I – ?”

“One of the Parks & Recreation Team blokes just chopped down a tree! And it’s on top of my bloody car!”

“I’m sorry to hear that, sir.”

“You were supposed to tow away any cars parked in my street today. And you haven’t! Why the hell not?”

“Change of policy, sir. The leader of the Council decided it was cheaper and easier to let residents claim on their insurance in these situations, rather than organise for a tow company to take their cars to the pound.”

“Aaaah! I am the leader of the Council, and it was a bloody joke. How stupid can you get?”

“I really couldn’t comment, sir.”

—

Click the blue froggy to read other writers’ offerings – and enjoy!

Five Sentence Fiction – Oh, the horror

freyathewriter 12 Comments

Courtesy of Joe’s Musings, I have found another flash fiction prompt, hosted by Lillie McFerrin. She has devised Five Sentence Fiction, a weekly prompt where there is no word limit, just a limit on the number of sentences. Plus, although she provides a word prompt, it is just for direction only – you don’t have to include the word itself in your contribution.

(Note to self: Remember that when you know that don’t have to include a particular word in your creation, be prepared for the onslaught of sentences popping up in your head where the word itself (like an irritating child) just absolutely has to be included. It’s like being told not to think of a blue elephant….!).

This week’s word is ‘learning’.  Here’s my offering – let me know what you think. Take part, why not?! And do go and have a look at the other wonderful submissions – just click on the blue froggy in Lillie’s post to see what our collective creativity can produce!

*****

– Oh, the horror –

Rowena has reached that age – you know the one.

For her, life is now too full of obligations, responsibilities and deadlines.

From this day forward the days yawn ahead, dull, grey and flat.

She has come to a terrible understanding.

Today is her sixteenth birthday.

*****

Lillie McFerrin Writes

Hidden in Plane Sight – Alastair’s Photo Fiction

freyathewriter 9 Comments

Here is my offering for Alastair’s Photo Fiction this week, inspired by the photo below.  Why not take part? And why not visit his photography and writing blog to take a look at his other photos…?

19-08-august-4th-2013

*****

– Hidden in Plane Sight –

“Look here, Givens, you need to paint the camouflage in properly! Here, give me your brush, for Pete’s sake.”

Archie Givens nodded, pretending to listen and pay attention as the uniformed NCO swirled the grey-green paint over the canvas in front of him.

“See? That’s the way! Make it count, boy! Now get your finger out!”

Archie took the paintbrush and started again, feigning concentration.  Satisfied at last, the military man strode away, making a beeline for the cafeteria.

Archie dropped his brush into the paint tin and shook his head at his best mate Johnny, who was curled up on the ground laughing silently, tears running down his cheeks.

“He don’t half get me goat! I’ll bloody swing for him! It’s not as if the Jerry pilots’ll be checking my artwork on these decoys from thousands of feet up!”

Johnny sniggered, then picked up the brush and daubed out a female pin-up, complete with nipped in waist, large breasts and a come-hither pout.

“Just in case, eh ? One last moment of joy for ‘em before our ack ack girls shoot ’em down!”

*****

This is my tribute to the many artists, builders, engineers and visionaries who worked on the K, Q and Starfish decoy sites in the UK during World War II, not forgetting the women of the ATS who risked their lives manning anti-aircraft guns.