Silk

And so the tissue-thin skin
covering the scar, sealing in the hurt and anger and grief
and burning, scalding emptiness
has stood well against the test of time.
Or so I think.
A famous sportsman has a skiing accident
A businessman dies in a London underground station
Another throws himself from a tall building in the City
A famous actor’s life is cut short – snap – just like that
And the delicate strands of the healing unravel, tear, gape.
The wound is opened, the bloody depths are revealed.
My throat stretches and aches to keep back the tears
and my eyes burn.
I am reminded that grief is not a path from A to B.
It meanders, traverses peaks and chasms, navigates switchbacks and
launches me into the air.
My parachute is gone, only ropes snaking my ankles –
freefall beckons and just, just when I think I will hit the ground
I am yanked back, ligaments and muscles tearing with effort
to just keep going.
It’s the hardest work I ever imagined.
Because that sorrow, that jolt, that catch of breath isn’t for those who have died, or are unaware.
It is for the souls left behind, making new patterns out of just getting through
wanting it to be temporary-permanent-over-never to end.
What’s left on the other side?
It is this. Just this.

******

This week, I am releasing some of my pent-up emotions. Life is filled with light and shade. This is how it is, sometimes.

Please do visit the dVerse Open Link Night for examples of some very fine poetry indeed – and be inspired… Join us! I will link up to this week’s post later today.

The Rush

If wishes were horses the devil would ride

He’d flay them with cruel whips and cut at their hides

Their strides he would lengthen with means all most foul

And scare their souls witless with a blood-freezing howl.

Those wishes are craven, all carved from regret

They weigh down our spirits, we cannot forget

all those lives we would live if times they had changed

and granted desires, hopes and dreams we’d arranged.

Like soldiers in battle ordered and neat

We planned our bright futures, could not wait to meet

the glorious high-life brilliantly displayed

Now disappointed we curse at the path, disarrayed.

Life is not like a spreadsheet, it’s wrinkled and rough

The devilish detail is knotted and tough

It will consume us in moments, time will speed past

Until we’re sighing our last breath, dismayed and aghast

at the time we have wasted on the roll of the dice

For at the end of the last day, no-one lives twice.

******

This poem came to me (yet again) on my travels on the London Underground last week. We were all herded out of the station as a man had suffered a heart attack and died on one of the platforms. It got me thinking about how there are no second chances, that we, a bunch of commuting strangers probably knew of his death before his own family – I found that fact on its own to be desperately sad. I wouldn’t choose to die in a London Underground station, in public – but that’s the point, we don’t often get to select the when, where and how of our death. So this, this is about making the most of every part of your life, because you really don’t know what’s lying in wait for you. Just don’t waste it, whatever you do… 

Please do visit the dVerse Open Link Night for examples of some very fine poetry indeed – and be inspired… Join us! You can link up later at 3pm EST – or whatever that works out to, wherever in the world you may be…

Nudge

We fell to the ground grasping at glory
Determined to keep all our honour intact
The more that we reached out with hands clawed and scratching
Our goal disappeared, fabled not fact
Yet still we advanced like mad fools, demented
Determined to make our dream come alive
Harness the earth, make it bow to our bidding
Secure our mad futures, in dark times to thrive
All sense, love and wonder seem things long-forgotten
The one thing that matters is power driven greed
We dismiss those who caution, they’re mad men and tree-huggers
Yet step back, take a moment – what do you believe?
We don’t own this planet, never have in millennia
No, it’s not ours to discard when we’re over and done
There is only one Earth, live on it lightly
We don’t get a second chance – there is no re-run.

******

You might be pleased to note that I am ready to submit my work in progress novel to the writing competition! The synopsis was my task at this month’s writing group – goodness me, it was hard work, but well worth it. All I need to do now is write a cover letter, print it all out and post it off – how exciting! (It is to me, anyway!). If nothing else, I’ve got back into the swing of entering my work, so there’s no excuse now…

This week’s poem is, once again, inspired by my novelling – this time, the general backdrop of environmental distress. I hope you find it a little thought provoking? 

Please do visit the dVerse Open Link Night for examples of some very fine poetry indeed – and be inspired… Join us!