Category Funny

The Understudy – Friday Fictioneers

freyathewriter 42 Comments

Here is this week’s entry into the weekly challenge brought to us by the lovely Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.

Here are the rules: Use the photo as inspiration, write a hundred(ish) words – and share! Here goes my offering for this week – and I welcome your comments again!

al_forbes

Copyright – Al Forbes

– The Understudy –

If Toby could speak, he would have a thing or two to say. The constant flow of immigrants and emigrants stepping over the threshold night and day had taught him a thing or two.

Pete had the cushy job, checking the credentials of those who wanted in, striking through the names of those who wanted out (although that was a relatively new phenomenon, to be fair).

It was always ‘St Peter this’ and ‘St Peter that’.

Nobody ever mentioned Toby, perched above the pearly gates.

Poor Toby, without even so much as a finger available to scratch that itch just above his right eye…

—-

Click on the blue froggy below to read others’ offerings!

Denied – dVerse Poetics (Halloween version)

freyathewriter 34 Comments

This week’s dVerse Poetics has us writing ghostly tales, but with a comedic twist. Such fun! It is very windy here on the coast tonight, and according to the weather forecast, worse is to come tomorrow evening – so my offering has picked up on that, as you will see!

I hope you enjoy it – and please visit dVerse to read all of the other creations!

– Denied –

The winds they howl and moan tonight
They say they’ll bring the folks a fright
Tear down trees and windows break
The gales will keep us all awake

‘Tis Halloween, the ghosts and ghouls
Should roam the earth and steal our souls
But the weather has them beat
And whipped them all from off their feet

They’re wrapped around the chimney stacks
Caught in trees, trapped in shacks
The wind has sucked away their cries
And turned them dumb, to their surprise

They clench their fists and gnash their teeth
Their tortured souls find no release
The one night of the year for fun
Has left our ghastly ghostlies glum

Frustrated in their scary games
They feel let down, a sense of shame
That dawn is almost on their heels
And not a scream has been revealed

From the throats of human prey
The winds have stolen fear away
The storm dies down, the daylight looms
The scary fiends are bathed in gloom

‘Twas Halloween, a terrible night
For ghosts that die to cause a fright
Mother Nature upped her game
The ghouls were silenced – what a shame!

Gargling with a Gargoyle – Alastair’s Photo Fiction

freyathewriter 12 Comments

Here is my offering for Alastair’s Photo Fiction this week, inspired by the photo below.  Why not take part? And why not visit his photography and writing blog to take a look at his other photos…?

Copyright - A Mixed Bag

Copyright – A Mixed Bag

– Gargling with a Gargoyle –

Sally has caught The Sore Throat, as my ever-pessimistic and annoyingly accurate husband had predicted.

Sally is usually smilingly robust (like me), but today, she is distraught.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” I do my best to be sympathetic, like a good mummy, but my mind is where I really want to be – immersed in the dreaming spires of Oxford, or more realistically my distance-learning course in Middle English.

I click on the link and the photo materialises – closely followed by the best squeal my daughter’s throat can muster. She hides her face in my shoulder, her little body shaking.

“It’s only the silly old gargoyle, Sally! I thought you liked him?” This is really weird. I stroke her hot little forehead, wondering if she is hallucinating.

“But Daddy had to put one in his throat when he was poorly last week! And he washed it in TCP too! It’s too big for my throat, Mummy!”

Her little face crumples, and I try very hard to suppress a smile. No wonder she had been so obsessed with John and his morning ministrations to his Man Flu.

Time to buy a dictionary – and indulge in a quick spelling lesson.